I went back to see the doctor the previous week for assessment of my CT scan result. The good doctor told me that the scan image indicated that there is no changes in size in the tumor size. His assessment is, the cancer activities is under controlled, and he is quite happy with the result. Happy with the result ? Well, I don't know what to say. After going through One and a half month of daily radiotherapy and oral chemo, I was a bit disappointed that the latest treatment regime was not successful in shrinking the tumor. But on the other hand, the consolation is, the cancer tumor marker reading has been substantially reduced, and it has not spread to other vital organs. I guess that is the prelude to a longer haul battle to regain my health. Well, I guess if the good doctor is happy with my progress so far, I will have to have faith in him to manage my treatment regime. The doctor has also given me another month of “medical leave” before I check in to the hospital again for consultation, assessment, as well as giving the allowance of time to figure out what is my next treatment regime.
This month is September month. A few months before September 2008, I was having some minor constipation issues, minor tummy upsets, and began to loose weight. After many visits to the doctor, I was shocked with the news that a 5CM tumor was detect at my pancreas! One year has passed, and I am still seeking treatment to overcome this health predicament ! Looking back, it has been a painful, scary, and difficult period for me during the previous one year. But, on the other hand, I also realized, it has also been an amazing journey of enlightenment and self discoveries.
I was indeed a blessed person with so many good friends and family members that cares about my well being. I was also indeed very lucky that the good Lord has provided for me to afford my medical bills. In his amazing way, the good Lord has guided me to live one day at a time, and provided me with abundances.
I read the statistic that said that patient with pancreatic cancer has less than 5% chance of surviving more than 5 years. I know, the odds are heavily stacked against me. But honestly speaking, over the previous one year, I had never loose hope in my ability to regain my health. Deep down in me, I know I am not sick, I am just having symptoms of this chronic illness. I will have to keep trying to get rid of these symptoms by putting my best foot forward to climb the stairs of recovery. The symptoms of illness may dent my physical body, but one thing for sure, they can never dent my spirit, my hope, my faith, and my determination to get well and to restore my life back to normalcy.
It is a lonely journey in my fight against cancer. As bad as I felt about the chances and statistic, but I am also determined to beat the odds and I am going to survive this ordeal !!!!